night 1/2 off
So I'm at work and alls fine and I mentioned my son playing in the band 2nite and H my boss says Ohhh you want to go?? And I'm thinking and say Oh noo it's OK.. hubby and C going and grandpa and J's dad and step mom and his uncle richie and step bro and my ex and his wife and my ex's dad and cousin.. so it's kinda a 'ex' fest at a home game guess I didn't think much about not going since I just assumed I had to work.. just way it goes.. but a little bit later she comes up to me with this plan says I can go.. T will bartend for me and this other waitress that doesn't feel good is going too.. and I should go after 1st quarter and walks away.. hummm so I ask T do you want to and she's like I guess I can.. but not to excited sounded and I felt horriable leaving her cuz there was 5 tables and i had people all night at the bar but H insisted she'd help as well.
Feel horriable leaving my table... Then I thought ok new tables in and I couldn't get away just yet and thought I don't really want to lose any hours and had all arranged with the ex and hubby but H came again asks are you leaving then.. it almost felt as if she wanted me to. I ask T again are you ok she says sure and refreshed her on martini's and I say to her I didn't want to go but H so insistant I feel I have to... and T's like well don't go then.. and I'm all confused and say yeah ok I won't.. ok I guess it's pretty clear she wanted me to just go so I just left. something totally didn't feel right there 2night after that.. maybe it was just me.. maybe it's her way of telling me to go knowing how guilty I feel leaving or taking time off... that is a nicer thought to think than what I have been feeling. I just think I would rather not impose on others at work although I am sure I did not... and sure it was all just fine. It was I was busy and content and it threw me off cuz it was unplanned.
So I'm driving to town 1/2 upset cuz it's been one of those upsetting days anyways... nice day for a kleenex box best friend. Just had a ton dumped on me rite b4 work that hit me hard.. .. and made me extra sensitive I'm sure after soooo . I get to the game a minutes b4 1/2 time.. watch the last play can't find hubs but stand and weesel my way up so I am able to watch the bands... I see J and he's so smiley and it was cute to see him playing the same sax I played and how much fun it looked like he was having reopened my tear ducts once again and I had to walk... I bump into a dozen or so ladies and friends and all are Hi and how r u and wow your off work and I'm yawning on purpose to hope to pull off the wet eye look from the yawn and not silly me... and so glad it worked cuz if any of them would've asked more I'd have broke until I turned around and Bomb... there was hubs and C.. my daughter was so cute and so excited to be at the game.. but everyone's why are you here... so why worry or ask why .. but why not just be happy I was... and then I was. We shared some popcorn and a hotdog and she was so cute and excited. Cheering with the cheer leaders it was cute.
Then went to my grandparents after the game for cookies and milk snacks.. for kids and played hide n seek and grandpa and hubs watching a western on TV and me and grams chatting was fun. Can't remember last time I'd been over there all of us a family just visiting... til 1015.. home put kids to bed and we broke out the ole 'PayDay' game. 6 months I came in 2nd with 70,200 and J in 1st with 77K. Poor hubs only had 56K... J won again he won the last time we played as well. Fun! Then I put in the movie anger management and b4 I got it all set up and ready I turned round and hubs snorning LOL.. no movie that's ok I guess. They planned on going hunting anyways in early am.
So I enjoyed my time off... almost too much. I guess it's a wake up call to me in a way that I'm not needed there as much as one likes to believe they are.. it's just not. and I should not take it so serious huh.. just do a good job, be yourself and smile :)